The guilt of poverty

Hi, my name is Miyahcore, and I think poor people are allowed to be happy.

I'm unsure why it's a controversial take but it is. Currently I'm dealing with the guilt of being impoverished, and doing something lavish for my birthday. I understand that impoverished people are allowed to go out to eat, go on trips, and enjoy the fruits of being alive.

... So why do I feel so bad...?